Overwhelmed and Excited

Guys, I have so much going on these days. Sometimes it feels overwhelming, but oftentimes I find myself just excited about what God is doing in my life.
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Playtime with reflux

Little Man had his 2-month appointment yesterday. He is a thriving, growing boy. At 12lbs12oz he has already gained 5lbs5oz from his birth weight. He has reflux. He DOESN’T have a food allergy. After a month of dairy free living, I’ve been eating dairy all week with no reaction!!! I still have an oversupply but we’re managing it. The oversupply is likely what caused the allergy-like symptoms which led me to eliminate dairy and soy from my diet. He probably has a tongue tie, it is visible, but it’s not to the point that movement is restricted, and clearly he doesn’t have a transfer issue, so we’ll let it be for now. I was reminded once again how much I LOVE my pediatrician. She is a real human being and talks with me like I’m a thinking human being too.

His baptism is this Sunday. This is such a special time for our family as we make a public commitment to teach him about God’s love, raise him in the community of believers, and pray for him as he grows. As an infant this is a covenant baptism, recognizing that we belong to Christ even before we understand it. When he is older he will be able to go through confirmation class and make his own public affirmation of faith. But because he’s so huge, I need to do a small alteration of the baptism outfit that was worn by his Papa and uncle, and made from his great-grandfather’s wedding shirt. The alteration will be a simple crotch extender, so it won’t impact the existing garment.
Littles Monster and Miss are in preschool three times a week and love it. They come home with new songs all the time. They have stories to tell about school. I can see leaps and bounds in their development. Little Monster is also in speech therapy (aka talking school) and will begin OT next week. I am so thankful that we can provide her with the help that she needs so that she can succeed. We are working to help her as much as possible NOW, before she begins VPK. She is so receptive to the help and wants to be understood.
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The best part of baking

 I feel like I’m constantly dealing with health insurance. I was on the phone with the marketplace for 1hr15min on Monday to update our information and switch policies again (I accidentally selected a policy this year that our pediatrician wasn’t covered under. OOPS!!) While insurance always seems to be a nightmare for me, I am SO THANKFUL that we have it. I just hope we can continue to have insurance.
I am always working on too little sleep, not enough patience, and a whole lot of prayer.
My mom and I wrote a children’s book last spring titled The New Baby Went to Heaven. We had a contract with a publishing company. We got through the editing stage, but no further. We learned last week that they suddenly closed their doors. I know that this will be a blessing. We are starting to explore new avenues to get our book published. I’m also excited about the second book we wrote, and two new inspired works that I’ll be working on this year.
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Sweet Baby Faith

Already we have been blessed by another author who also happens to work with NILMDTS, and edited our picture of baby Faith into a beautiful keepsake where she actually looks like the peaceful baby that I so briefly held in my arms instead of the stillborn baby under flourescent lighting. I was so thankful that the hospital took pictures of her, but wished for better quality. One of my regrets was that we didn’t take our own pictures of her while I held her. So this is an amazing gift as we approach her one-year stillbirthday. I now have a picture I can show my living children of their sister that we lost too soon.

The women’s community Bible study started up again last week and I’m loving the new study of 1 Peter, and the fellowship with these amazing women as we learn and grow together. I have never done a study like this – a study on how to really study the Bible. It has been so enriching in just the first week!
I have not been as active on my blog as I would like. I have so many thoughts, but then never get it on screen.
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Lending Library pretties to play with

I continue to volunteer with our local babywearing chapter. I love having another outlet for my writing as I help with the blog (even though I’ve totally slacked on this lately!). This group has meant so much to me. From them I learned how to wear Little Miss with confidence so that I could care for both her and Little Monster when she was little. I have gained so many friendships through the group. They were a huge help to me when we lost baby Faith. They have continued to support me in my mommyhood journey. The group is constantly evolving as people move away or babies grow out of wearing, but the friendships remain.

The farm continues on. We are going to be adding chickens soon, once we can make the time to build the chicken tractor. I’m excited about the future of our farm. I’m excited to be good stewards of the land and animals that we have been blessed with. I learn something everyday!

 

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‘Gardening’ in the morning

I’m getting back into my crafting, whether with wood or with fibers. It is so challenging finding the time and managing the littles so I can do the things I want to do, but it is so empowering once I get it done. And I think it’s so important for them to see me doing things that I enjoy. For my girls (and eventually Little Man) to see me do the more traditional women’s activites like sewing and such, and to see that women can build things with wood too, which historically was the man’s domain.
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Mama’s workbench

Speaking of the man, Hubby works long hours and oftentimes comes home exhausted, physically and mentally. He is working on too little sleep too. It often seems like we hardly talk to one another between his work hours and the nightly routine with the kids. But somehow we still manage to make time to ensure we’re on the same page, working toward the same goals for our family. We have started a new reminder for one another though, that this is not forever. This is only a season.
So that’s most of the things going on these days. This started out as a Facebook post, but got so long I brought over here to the blog. But all this to say, life is good. Very busy, challenging, exhausting, but good.

Slowly Moving into the New Year

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We’re a week into January and I’m finally starting to look to the new year and make some goals. This is pretty typical for me though. I have a January birthday, so I always give myself a little extra time to ‘debrief’ from the previous year before moving into the new one. Especially this year – 2016 was extra… eventful. I hadn’t planned it, but the themes of 2016 ended up being community, thankfulness, and family. My Bible verse for the year was Jeremiah 29:11-13, “‘For I know the Plans I have for you,’ says the Lord. ‘Plans to prosper you and not to harm you….'” Continue reading

Reminders of Faith

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Carry you with Faith – photo courtesy of Uncle Patrick

I didn’t want Little Man’s pregnancy and life to forever be in Faith’s shadow, but she shaped who we are today. Little Man wouldn’t be here if not for Faith’s tiny life. This is beauty from the ashes.

There are times when I look down at him while nursing that I realize I never got to experience those tender moments with Faith. I will never know what it would have felt like to feed her. To watch her as she dozed off, satisfied in what I can offer. Continue reading

Chicken Soup

We’ve had a cold in our house for a month, off and on. It started with Little Miss, then moved on to Little Monster and me, and finally to the Hubby. Even Little Man caught it at just a week old. We had soup on the menu a week before his birth, with plans for an easy dinner of canned soup, but when Little Miss was feeling so rough I decided I needed to feed her the good stuff. I made extra and canned it to have a super easy, delicious, healing meal after Baby Skywalker arrived. It was so nice to open up some homemade goodness in a can just days after the birth. Continue reading

Navigating Pregnancy After Loss With Littles

Pregnancy after loss is hard. There are so many doubts and fears. So much pressure to do the right thing this time. Prenatal care is treated differently. While it is a joyful time of hope and anticipation, it is also a scary time because your innocence is lost. You know that anything can happen at any time, and it is completely out of your control. All you can do is pray.

But pregnancy after loss can be hard for your children too. Continue reading